Posted on

Cambridge IELTS 9 Model Answer (Test 4, Task 2)

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

With globalisation comes an almost inevitable joining together of cultures, experiences and languages. One of the consequences of this is that a great many lesser-spoken languages are dying, as they are no longer required in the context of the modern world. This could be either be seen as a positive or a negative, depending on whether a business or a cultural view is taken.

From a business perspective, moving towards a singular international language is not only sensible, but has in fact already begun. International trade and diplomatic relations are just two key areas that are made easier without a language barrier, and English has already positioned itself as the world’s leading language in these areas. The potential for misunderstanding and misrepresentation is dramatically lowered, and this extends to the public in general, with holidays and wider social communication made all the more possible by a singular, shared language.

On the other hand, culture and tradition is rooted within language. To lose one’s national tongue could be seen as losing one’s identity. If this happens, it could cause no small amount of resentment, in particular towards nations which speak the chosen international language as their first. This could actually lead to diplomatic issues rather than solutions, which is precisely what globalisation is seeking to reduce.

In conclusion, while I am entirely in favour or closer diplomatic relations between countries, I strongly believe that it is extremely important that traditional values and cultures are upheld. Seeing as I am convinced that language and culture are inseparable, I disagree with the idea that life would be better with fewer languages in the world.

(269 words)

A few points:

  1. You don’t need to start with “nowadays” or something that means the same thing!
  2. I don’t think you should put your opinion in the introduction, unless you know you won’t finish in time. Be neutral, acknowledging both sides to the argument, in the introduction, and then present your view in the conclusion.
  3. Remember, if you are running out of time, you must write a conclusion. A good thing to do is to make your second body paragraph in to a list of bullet points, like this:

On the other hand, culture and tradition is rooted within language.

  • Lose language = lose identity
  • Resentment towards some nations
  • Lead to diplomatic issues

Now, write the conclusion and spend some time on it!

You will lose fewer marks for doing this than you will for writing complete body paragraphs without a conclusion!

Posted on

Cambridge IELTS 9 Model Answer (Test 4, Task 1)

Test 4 Task 1

The line graph outlines energy consumption in the USA from 1980 to the present day, with further projections up until 2030. Use is recorded in quadrillion units and is divided in to six categories, almost all of which display a general increase over time.

For the entirety of the period covered, petrol and oil usage is the highest. In 1980, 35 quadrillion units were used, and this dipped a little initially before rising steadily to a projected peak of 50 quadrillion units by 2030. This rate of increase is matched by that of coal, whose usage climbs from around 16 quadrillion units to just over 30 quadrillion units over the same period of time. This means that, by 2030, it is expected to be the second-most used fuel, whereas in 1980 natural gas usage was higher, at 20 quadrillion units. However, usage of this fuel is expected to remain at 25 quadrillion units from 2015 until 2030.

At the other end of the spectrum, nuclear fuel and solar / wind fuel usage is not predicted to change drastically, with increases from 3 to 8 and 3 to 6 quadrillion units respectively. In slight contrast, usage of hydropower, which was also 3 quadrillion units in 1980, dropped very slightly to approximately 2.5 quadrillion units in 2011, and it is not expected that this level of usage will change in the future.

(205 words)

A few points.

  1. In the introduction, explain what the X and Y axes display – time and quadrillion units.
  2. If there are any trends that are the same, make reference to that – coal / petrol and oil increase at a very similar rate.
  3. Similarly, highlight contrasts. Coal and Natural Gas change places between 1980 and 2030.
  4. Decide how to group your information. Here, I’ve decided to group three high and three low together in paragraphs.
Posted on

Cambridge IELTS 9 Model Answer (Test 3, Task 1)

This post took me a lot of time to make. It isn't free it definitely isn't expensive! Help support my work by buying this post.

Posted on

Cambridge IELTS 9 Model Answer (Test 2, Task 2)

This post took me a lot of time to make. It isn't free it definitely isn't expensive! Help support my work by buying this post.

Posted on

Cambridge IELTS 9 Writing Model Answer (Test 1, Task 2)

This post took me a lot of time to make. It isn't free it definitely isn't expensive! Help support my work by buying this post.

Posted on

IELTS Writing – Organising your essay (Part II – Introduction)

For part two, when you first see the question how do you feel? Nervous? Confused? Panicked? Timing is a problem, but if you have a clear picture of what your essay will look like, this could help you relax a bit. This page is going to give a few tips on how to do that.

OK, let’s look at an example:

Many newspapers and magazines feature stories about the private lives of famous people. We know what they eat, where they buy their clothes and who they love. We also often see pictures of them in private situations.

Is it appropriate for a magazine or newspaper to give this kind of private information about people?

Step 1 is obviously reading the question, checking understanding and finding the question. I get a lot of students who give up before they start because they read the question and there is a word they don’t understand. Don’t panic! Try and look at the word in the sentence and if you still can’t understand it, just delete the word. It’s only confusing you and if you can’t see it, then it won’t any more.

For example: Maybe you don’t know the words feature and appropriate above. So, let’s delete them and see what we have:

Many newspapers and magazines ______ stories about the private lives of famous people. We know

what they eat, where they buy their clothes and who they love. We also often see pictures of them in private situations.

Is it __________ for a magazine or newspaper to give this kind of private information about people?

Less confusing? This is the question for you to answer. Don’t worry about the words we have deleted.

Now let’s split the question in to two parts: background and question.

Background: 

Many newspapers and magazines ______ stories about the private lives of famous people. We know what they eat, where they buy their clothes and who they love. We also often see pictures of them in private situations.

Question:

Is it __________ for a magazine or newspaper to give this kind of private information about people?

So, for our introduction, we need to think about two things:

1) Writing a sentence or two about the background. This is very much like in part I, where you are copying the idea from the title, but using your own words.

2) Preparing the examiner for what we are going to write about. In this sentence, you should think about what your main ideas are, but not write any argument.

For this, 40 words is enough and you definitely don’t want to write more than 65. Here’s an example:

Sentence 1) – Background:

Over the past two decades, interest in celebrity life has increased to the point where every aspect of their lives is examined, documented and published in the media.

Sentence 2) – What am I going to write about?

Clearly, this raises questions about whether it is right to deny a person the right to privacy. Not only that, but it would appear that these stories that are being printed are not useful in any way.

Now the examiner knows that I am going to write about two things:

1) Is it right to deny the person a right to privacy?

2) These stories are not useful in any way.

These will be the titles of my two body paragraphs, and it is really important that you write about the subjects from the second part of your introduction – not something else!

Now you try with this question:

Some people feel that certain workers like nurses, doctors and teachers are undervalued and should be paid more, especially when other people like film actors or company bosses are paid huge sums of money that are out of proportion to the importance of the work that they do.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

The second part of this lesson looks at an example introduction and how to organise the main body. You can find it here: http://wp.me/p2RmnE-4P

Enjoy!

Simon

Posted on

Writing – Using the Passive

A lot of exam classes and coursebooks focus on the form of the passive and I’m sure that most people know how to “make” a passive sentence. BUT… do you know why you are doing it?

I’m going to start with two sentences that might surprise you:

1) The Passive is not “formal”.

2) The Passive is not “grammar”.

I will explain.

Form

Just to check… the way to “make” a passive sentence is: Object + “be” + Verb 3 (+Subject)

So… “Tolkien wrote The Lord of the Rings” becomes “The Lord of the Rings was written by Tolkien” and “Someone is robbing me” becomes “I am being robbed” – ‘by someone’ is not necessary.

Why Passive?

OK, I said before that I don’t think passive is grammar. Yes, it has a form, but so does vocabulary. (“Interested + in” for example). So, why do we really use it? Well, here are a couple of examples.

1) Groups of people

The police have arrested three men for burglary.

Scientists say that we are now using more of our brains than before.

  • Only the police can arrest people, so we don’t need the subject.
  • Which scientists? You don’t know, so does it matter that they are scientists?

I would write: “Three men have been arrested for burglary” and “It is said that we are now using more of ours brains than before”.

Is this formal? Well, the news often presents stories including information from groups of people – scientists, students, doctors, teachers… so this may make us associate the passive with formality.

2) Flow of Information

Look at the short paragraph below:

The Internet

Tim Berners-Lee wrote his internet proposal in 1989. Mike Sendall accepted the revision in 1990 and CERN put it online in 1991. The first page that CERN published was http://info.cern.ch/hypertext/WWW/TheProject.html and it provided an explanation of how the world-wide web worked.

First of all, the text above has no “mistakes”, but it could be improved.

In written text, we try to put new information at the end of a sentence. Look at sentence 1:

“Tim Berners-Lee wrote his internet proposal in 1989.”

The title of the paragraph is “The Internet” so this is not new information. The new information is “Tim Berners-Lee” and “1989”. So, let’s write:

“The proposal for the internet was written by Tim Berners-Lee in 1989.” Now the new information is at the end. We can do the same for the second sentence, which is in two parts:

“Mike Sendall accepted the revision in 1990” – Mike Sendall is new information.

“CERN put it online in 1991” – CERN is new information. SO…..

Revisions were accepted by Mike Sendall in 1990 and it was put online by CERN in 1991.

Now let’s look at the next part:

“The first page that CERN published was http://info.cern.ch/hypertext/WWW/TheProject.html and it provided an explanation of how the world-wide web worked.”

In the first part of the sentence, the new information is the website link. In the second part, the new information is what the website does. So, do we need to write “and an explanation was provided of how the world-wide web worked”? No!

So, after our changes we have:

The proposal for the internet was written by Tim Berners-Lee in 1989. Revisions were accepted by Mike Sendall in 1990 and it was put online by CERN in 1991. The first page that CERN published was http://info.cern.ch/hypertext/WWW/TheProject.html and it provided an explanation of how the world-wide web worked.

This paragraph shows better style, and this is something that examiners look at when marking IELTS and Cambridge Exam papers. One extra thing we could do is avoid repeating “CERN” by using the passive again:

“The first page that was published was……”

Conclusion

Next time you write a paragraph, try checking what you have written and finding the new information. Is it at the end of the sentence or sentence part? If it isn’t, can you change the sentence? Would using passive help or have you used passive in a place that doesn’t need it, meaning that the new information is at the start?

Simon